It Was Unexpected

"I'm sorry to bother you while you're on vacation, but I really need to talk to you."

It was a bit disorienting hearing her voice.  I hadn't expected many people to call me while I was away, let alone her.  

"You remember me, don't you?"

It was Charlotte, Jenni's cousin.  I had followed her blog for the last year but hadn't seen her in person for years before that.  Phone calls from Charlotte never happened, especially not while Jenni and I were in Vegas, trying to get away from it all.  

"Jenni gave me your number in case of emergency and I'm afraid it is."

I was trying to find just the right outfit that would make me look hip and fashionable again.  I felt like Carrie Bradshaw with long curly hair and a closet full of clothes straight from the runway, but the ten-years-ago runway.  Jen and I had decided at the last minute to ditch our plans of staying in the hotel room where we would inevitably talk about our husbands and kids and actually go out to a club or find a party.  

We needed to feel renewed, young and full of life again.  

Jen had already picked her cute outfit and was leaning against the door frame of the closet, waiting for me to just pick something already!  I had the phone balanced on my shoulder, pressed against my ear, attempting to pull up a colorful broom skirt when I grabbed the phone to listen more carefully.

"Emergency?  What's going on?  Are you ok?"

"I just can't find it anymore," she started to say.  "You follow my blog - I travel, I help people out and I do all the little things but I can't find the joy in it anymore."

My tense muscles relaxed and I went back to my juggling act.

"Oh....  Well, I think all the things you do are good, but you have to remember that sometimes, the joy can also come from pain.  It can come from a very difficult situation that you are struggling through, that you feel anguish and heartache over and that you work really hard at.  When it's finally over, the satisfaction of knowing how hard you worked and how much emotion you felt and how many lessons you've learned brings intense joy.  It's like completing a task that you have put your everything into and realizing that it's all finished.  You fought a good fight and you know are a better person because of it.  That's joy, too."

As I looked in the mirror and realized how hideous, lumpy and out-of-date I looked, it didn't matter because I knew that the reason she had called was to help me realize the truth of what I was telling her.

...And then I heard a clinking sound, miles away.  

It was almost like a whisper. 

 Clink, clink, clink.  

And then it was gone.  

And then there it was again.

I slowly opened my eyes to see Cam in his SpongeBob pajamas on the floor next to my bed, playing with my belt.  I rolled over and realized it was all just a dream. 

 A weird and important dream.  

I guess my mind was trying to sort things out...